Once upon a time there was a young girl who had a pair of gloves. They were brown and itchy, and she didn’t like them one bit. She longed for a pair of pretty little stretchy gloves like all her friends at school but her father was adamant about her having good gloves for winter. Every morning in the winter, as she got ready to walk to the bus stop she grumbled about her brown itchy gloves.

“Why can’t I just have some pretty gloves?” she asked her dad.

“These gloves are wool, they are warm, these are good gloves!” he replied.

One day it happened; the gloves went missing. While the little girl felt bad about losing her gloves she was more excited about the opportunity to get new ones! She told her dad she lost her gloves at school. He grumbled about it, but wasn’t really too upset. A few days went by and her dad came home with some new gloves! The little girl was so excited to wear new pretty stretchy gloves. She was sorely disappointed when she saw not a pair of pretty stretchy gloves, but another pair of brown itchy gloves.

A few more weeks and a lot more grumbling went by. Then it happened again. The little girl lost her second pair of gloves. She knew her dad was going to be upset this time. With her head sunk low she told him she left them on the bus. And just as she had suspected her dad was less than pleased.

“You have to keep track of your things. We are going to go find them!”

With that the little girl’s dad loaded her in the car and drove the school district parking lot where all the buses were kept. They searched the bus – nothing. No gloves.

“I guess you’re going to have to check at school tomorrow – and if you can’t find them, you might just have cold hands.” said her dad.

The little girl thought that cold hands seemed better than brown itchy warm gloves.

Af few more days when by, no gloves were found. One day her mom came home from work with a new pair of purple knit gloves. The little girl was elated!

“Are these for me?” she asked

“Yes” said her mom “but you have to keep track of them.”

“I will, I promise.” said the little girl.

And you know what? She did.

This is a true story. I’m sure you’ve guessed by now that the little girl is me. And I can almost guarantee that if my parents still lived in the house that I grew up in I could find those purple gloves today.

So what’s the point of this story? Just to illustrate the fact that having your child’s buy-in is a good thing. While we can’t leave all the decisions up to our young children, we can give them some buy-in. My Dad’s heart was in the right place. He just wanted me to be warm and have good gloves. The part that was missing was my buy-in. I just wanted to have pretty gloves. I didn’t care if they were warm or not; and I certainly didn’t care about those darn brown itchy gloves which is probably why I lost two pairs. When children have the opportunity to give input, be heard, and have a little bit of ownership over decisions both big and small, often the outcome is better for everyone. Do you have any brown itchy gloves in your closet?